only real in connection?
I question a need in me to feel central to others,
I want to love my grandchildren
and to be happy for them when they’re away from me
and thoroughly into their own worlds,
with me but an occasional thought,
yet I miss them and want us to be around each other,
as a teacher, consciously I hold the student at the center:
I help them get on the bike
and then they pedal away from me into competence,
recently I’ve heard back
two wonderful examples of appreciation
of my careful support for a student, for a colleague,
and, despite my wishes, I feel I need that,
I seek to be happy with what I give
and to resist the impostor syndrome
that whispers doubt after doubt into my ear,
it’s as if I fear I’m not real
unless seen and reflected in another’s eyes.
by Henry H. Walker
August 14, ’16
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