the child, and the path

the tension between license and control

how can a skinned knee be a blessing?

the too-protective world shields the child

at the cost of denying the child

the right to make mistakes,

and thus the right to make one’s own path,

there skinned knees, wet feet, and brambles await,

as well as the skills to persevere

through difficulties and mistakes

into the power that a person can live

when the self is trusted to make its own way,

the “school of hard knocks” is real,

and it is hard to know when it’s best

to protect the fragile child

and when it’s best

to allow the child to make mistakes,

then to learn what works and what doesn’t,

and thus to become a stronger self,

in our middle school staff meetings,

I feel a a tension between

the excesses of either license or control,

of giving rein to the horse

or holding it to the path,

somehow we need to hold both the parent who holds the child close,

and the parent who lets the child go into its own future,

at my deepest, I seek to honor the self

struggling to be the best it can,

I see and celebrate what is working

while also lovingly I work to help the self

to realize what didn’t work.

by Henry H. Walker

March 23, ’18

honoring the work of Wendy Mogel Ph.D.

The Blessing Of A Skinned Knee: Using Timeless Teachings to Raise Self-Reliant Children

also check out Joan's writing on her new blog:
http://joandwalker.com/rough-terrain/